Honouring the Unseen: Healing After Abortion, Miscarriage, Stillbirth, Vanishing Twin & Early Loss

Eugene Wynyard
Oct 27
3 min read

Honouring the Unseen: Healing After Abortion, Miscarriage & Early Loss

There are losses the world rarely sees. No funeral. No flowers. No framed photos. No milestones to share.

And yet, for so many mothers, fathers, and families — the love was real. The bond was real. The grief is real.

When a baby is lost through miscarriage, abortion, stillbirth, vanishing twin syndrome, or any form of early pregnancy loss, the heart doesn’t measure the worth of that life by weeks or milestones. It simply feels the absence — deeply, silently, and often alone.

The Invisible Grief No One Talks About

Society has rituals for most kinds of loss — funerals, wakes, memorials — moments where community gathers and validates pain.But early pregnancy loss often exists outside those rituals. There’s no public acknowledgment, no formal goodbye. Parents are left carrying a private grief that the world doesn’t recognise.

It’s an emotional limbo: the love was real, but there’s no evidence to show it. The grief is raw, but there’s no language for it.

For many, this silence hurts as much as the loss itself.

Abortion and Miscarriage: Two Paths, One Common Heartache

Every story is unique, yet both carry the same shadow — silence.

After abortion, emotions may tangle — grief beside relief, guilt beside gratitude — all valid, all human.After miscarriage, being told “it’s common” can feel like an erasure of a love already blooming.Stillbirth brings the cruel juxtaposition of a fully formed baby never held alive.Vanishing twin loss leaves one heartbeat echoing where two once beat.

None of these losses need fixing or comparison.All need witness.

Because a parent’s love doesn’t require a birth certificate to be real.

Creating Space for Healing

That’s why we created Memories After — a sacred online space where invisible grief can finally be seen.

Here, parents can honour their baby’s memory, give them a name, and create a tribute that says, you existed, you mattered, you are remembered.

Light virtual candles. Upload ultrasound images. Write letters. Invite loved ones to contribute.Craft a shareable, private, or public digital memorial — a living testament not of loss, but of love.

A place to return to, to reflect, to grieve, and eventually to heal.

For some, this is the first time they’ve been able to publicly acknowledge their baby’s existence.For others, it’s a step toward reconciling with a past they’ve carried in silence for too long.

Every story, every tribute, becomes part of something larger — a community of remembrance that whispers back: You’re not alone.

Why Remembrance Matters

Healing begins when grief is witnessed.When someone else says, I see your pain, and it’s valid, something shifts. The isolation softens. The shame dissolves. The heart starts to breathe again.

Memorialising a lost baby isn’t about reopening wounds — it’s about giving those wounds air, light, and dignity. It transforms what was once hidden into something beautiful and sacred.